Words Unspoken
by Danny vs A Month
Summary: The war is over. The emperor is dead, again. And everyone is happy. Everyone but a failed stormtrooper and a Jedi-in-training. But misery can sometimes be exactly what you need to finally say what you never could.


I do not own Star Wars or any of the characters. I had to put this out. Partially to correct the wrongs of the last movie, which I will likely do with other stories, and maybe a rewrite of the third movie, and other things as well. But for now, and extended ending. _**HEAVY SPOILERS FOR THE RISE OF SKYWALKER! ! !**_

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Words Unspoken

Finn stared at his hands in silence. The war was over. The celebration was in full swing. And everyone was happy. Everyone but Finn and Rey. Finn could feel it. He could feel Rey's pain and grief. He could feel it so strongly that it was nearly suffocating sometimes. He never _had_ gotten the chance to tell her that he was Force-sensitive. He had tried, but there was always more training to do. More missions for him to fly without her. More chances to never see her again. And always without a single goodbye.

But Finn was unhappy for more reasons than just Rey's suffering. As terrible as it was, he had his own problems too. Nightmares. Regrets. A single burning fact that refused to give him peace even after he had accepted it. It had never been him.

"What's got you so down?" Poe asked, clapping Finn on the shoulder. "Come on Finn. It's a party! We won! Celebrate! Drink! Eat! Be merry!" He lowered his voice slightly. "Maybe you could finally tell Rey."

"Tell her what, Poe!?" Finn snapped. "Huh? Tell her what? Tell her that I'm in love with her? Is that it? You think I should tell her that? That I've _been_ in love with her since before we took down Starkiller Base? That even if I couldn't get anyone to help me rescue her, I'd have gone anyway? Because even if I died, it'd be better than living in a galaxy where she didn't exist? is that what I should tell her? That I wasn't afraid to die fighting Kylo Ren as long as I took him with me in order to keep Rey safe? Or maybe I should tell her I'm Force-sensitive! Maybe that I should tell her about how I haven't slept _even once_ since we left Exegol because every time I close my eyes I feel Rey die! Huh? Should I tell her that!? Should I tell her that I sensed it when she died? That I could feel it like a blade in my heart? Should I tell her that I _didn't want_ to be rescued by Lando? That I _wanted_ to die in a fiery explosion when that command ship crashed because living without her would be unbearable? Oh how about this, Poe? How about I tell her that I felt it when she kissed _Kylo Ren_!? How about I tell her how much pain I'm in because the person she loves isn't me, it's the guy who's spent every second of the time they've known each other _trying to kill her_!? How about I tell her how frustrated and hurt I am that I lost to someone who almost killed me and her both dozens of times, just because whatever connection may or may not exist between me and her, it's not strong enough to be worthy of her even noticing it just because I haven't been trained my whole life to use the Force!? Because I can't read her mind, or track her halfway across the galaxy using the Dark Side of the Force! How about I tell her that one, Poe? Oh, I know! How about the fact that I can sense her pain, and her grief at Kylo Ren being dead so strongly that it's _suffocating_ to me!? That I can't even breathe when she cries because of the pain I can sense from her? Well? Which one should I say? You tell me, Poe! What do I say to her that will even matter!?"

Poe stared at him in stunned silence for a long while, struggling to think of something, anything, to say.

"That's what I thought," Finn snarled. "Get the fuck away from me Poe. Go enjoy your party. Leave me to slink off and die in some gravity well or asteroid field somewhere where no one will ever miss me."

Poe's eyes widened as Finn stood, only for Finn to stop as Poe glanced past him and froze, eyes widening still further. Finn sighed, hands curling into fists. He couldn't do this. Not now. Now he needed to be away. To stop feeling.

"Is that...Is that all true?" Rey asked. "Do you really...feel that way?"

Finn was silent for a moment before walking away, shoving Poe roughly aside as he passed him and leaving the room. We walked quickly, desperate to get away where he wouldn't have to face her, wouldn't have to see the hurt and guilt that he knew he would. Bad enough he could already sense it. However, before he could find a ship to steal, or a door to lock, her hand caught his arm and his body betrayed him, stopping on a dime, so perfectly obedient that it seemed his body had never truly intended to allow him to escape her.

"Why didn't you ever tell me?" Rey demanded, her voice thick with emotion. "Why didn't you...Why didn't you ever say anything!?"

"I did!" Finn finally snapped, wrenching his arm away only to turn on her. "I tried _so many_ times to tell you the truth! But every time I did, there was always something else! You had to destroy Starkiller Base! You had to go train with Luke while I was in a coma! You had to go meet Snoke! You had to train with Leia instead of spending more than five minutes at a time with _anyone_! You had to find a Sith Wayfinder! You had to face Kylo Ren alone! You had to deal with your fear of falling to a dark side you've _never _had alone! You had to face Palpatine, _alone_! There was always something! I get that those things were important too! But you can't blame me for never telling you something that you never cared to hear, when you were so busy dealing with your own problems that you didn't even see everyone else trying to help you! I almost died for you, multiple times, and you left me behind! Again and again! And still I loved you! You chose to fight and I was there for you every step of the way! And yet every step of the way, you turned your back on me! You left me in a coma! You left me to fight the First Order at our base without you! You let me fight an entire armada of planet-destroying Sith Star Destroyers with a handful of junkers and a shoddy plan! You were fine with me risking my life for you every time, but any time I needed something, or any time I wanted to talk, or to spend time with you, you had something else going on!"

"How was I supposed to know!?" Rey argued, voice wavering.

"You could have payed attention to something other than him!" Finn snapped. "You could have opened your goddamn eyes and looked around _even once_! I told you how I felt in every way except verbally! You are _literally_ the only person who never knew!"

"That's not fair!" Rey cried.

"I don't give a damn if it's fair!" Finn shouted. "Do you think it's fair to go into a coma, then find out that the person you almost died to protect didn't even wait an hour before they left!? Do you think it's fair to be thrown with the Force for trying to help, and then just be left there to almost be swept away and drowned!? Or to go on a suicide mission with _no hope_ of seeing you again, just because you _might_ make it off of the planet alive if I do!? Do you think it's fair that the only reason he was able to win your heart was because he knew how to use the Force to forcefully create a connection between the two of you so that he could sense your thoughts, but I, who have no training at all, can sense your pain so clearly that it feels like my heart's being ripped out of my chest? That I should be able to sense your death even in the middle of a battle so clearly that my own heart stops too, but that _he's _the one that gets what he wants!?"

"No!" Rey snapped. "It's not fair! It was never fair that I couldn't be at your side! It was never fair that I had to say goodbye to you so many times, and be so afraid that I'd never see you again! It was never fair that I had to watch you almost die over and over, and yet be so powerless to help you despite being a Jedi! And it's no fair that I came after you to see if you really do feel the same way you do, but now you can't even stand the sight of me!"

Both fell silent, Finn's mouth hanging open slightly as he stared at her, and Rey somewhere between angry and hurt, crying and rubbing furiously at her eyes.

"What...You..."

"Yes!" Rey snapped, then sighed. "I love you, Finn. Ever since you came to save me, and risked your life to fight Kylo Ren for me. I...I love you, Finn. And I'm so sorry for hurting you."

"Oh would you two just kiss already!" Poe groaned, words slurring, as he stepped out from around a corner, swaying slightly. "Your congratulatory beers are getting warm, and the sexy bounty hunter waiting for me in my bed is getting bored. Just hurry up and kiss so we can all get on with our lives!"

"Really Poe, your timing is just perfect," Finn said, glaring at the pilot. "Always. Such perfect timing."

"Finn," Rey said.

"Well he-"

Rey cut Finn off by pulling him into a kiss, and he gave up trying to continue complaining about Poe, deciding to put his mouth to much better use. After several seconds, Rey pulled back, tears running down her cheeks as she smiled. "I love you."

"I love you too," Finn smiled.

"That's nice, now can we..." he trailed off as they began to kiss again, showing absolutely no sign of intending to stop this time. "Okay, you know what, fuck this. I have better things to do. I'm just going to leave these here."

He set the two mugs on the ground and turned, swaying back down the hallway and leaving them alone again.

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Leave a review. I just couldn't leave it as it was.


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